Thanksgiving dinner...missing my dad

Holidays still are pretty difficult for me since my dad passed. Even having my grandmother sit at the head of the table (which was always my dad's spot) REALLY made me upset. Grandmere even called it "her" spot at one point - that almost set me off.

Holidays now miss much of the fun they used to have. My dad had such a great sense of humor, so there was always so much laughter at the dinner table when he was here. I remember everyone eating and talking at the table for HOURS - my dad driving so much of the hilarious conversation. But now it seems we finish our Thanksgiving dinner within an 1/2 hour of sitting down. Hours of food preparation, then we seem to be shoving food down our necks and quickly cleaning up. I really wish we had those long, relaxing, and laughter-filled dinners back....I wish I had my dad back.

It was Nolan's 1st Thanksgiving. We'll have to try to bring back some the excitement the holidays used to have - I want Nolan to experience the incredible times I was able to experience. He, Robert, and Connor deserve that kind of incredible family experience.

I am truly thankful, however, that I have such an amazing, close-knit family. I am incredibly close to my mom, Jarrod, Jenn, and my nephews. Based on conversations with friends, it seems that that closeness is truly rare.
So what I'm thankful for this year: an amazing husband (our 1st thanksgiving as a married couple), the most adorable and amazing son, and an amazingly close-knit, supportive family.

Here are some pics of that day: